I am down -.2lbs this week!! Yes, you read that right. I am going to celebrate it because it is my ‘cycle’ week and I am a bloated, emotional mess and I need a reason to celebrate. In all seriousness, I usually gain 3-5lbs during my lady time to fact that I had any loss at all makes me want to shout from the mountain tops.
For those of you keeping track, it is day 5 of my beverage cleanse. I have not had any caffeine withdrawal headaches like I thought I would so that’s a plus. One thing that this is helping me realize is that I really like coffee…and wine. Also, I miss how comforting it is to have a warm tasty beverage when you’re not feeling well or when you want to relax at the end of a long day. 5 more days to go and then I will give the run-down of my whole experience.
I’m feeling stuck…again. My weight this week was exactly the same as last week. That was a little deflating but I’ll take that over having a gain. I’m going to have to be more consistent about hitting the gym and eat way more veggies and a few less carbs.
This weekend, I posted a pic of me in my Mickey Mouse leggings. Two body shots in as many weeks? I’m feeling myself! I love them and felt like I look ok in them. It’s an extremely vulnerable place to be in for me, sharing myself. I find that in my vulnerability, there is strength. Luckily, I have an amazing support system which helps when I need a bit of shoring up.
I got to visit my home town this weekend. I got to see my parents and our youngest daughter (She just turned 26 on 1/23). I miss them so much so it also makes me feel ‘full’ to see them and be around them.
I also got to see cousins and countless others I have known my entire life who’ve become ‘family’. I’m glad we have our life in the the Tri-Cities and for all the ‘framily’ (friends that are like family) we’ve gained over the past 12yrs but there’s no place like home.
I have to admit that yesterday morning, I was feeling some kind of way after climbing on the scale. I did not have any weight loss this week. I mean, I was sad and wanted to go climb back in my bed.
Then, I gave myself a swift kick in the butt (mentally) and decided to focus on non-scale victories. I have lost 70lbs!! and while I didn’t have any weight loss this week, I also did not have any weight gain. Not even an ounce. I managed to shake it off. I put on my Miss Piggy t-shirt (because she’s fab and I am fab) and some cute jeans and a cute hat and came to work. Did I mention that the T-shirt is 6 sizes smaller than it would’ve been 6 months ago? Oh, and the jeans are 4 sizes smaller? I had my co-worker take a full-body pic (which I hate) so I could look at myself.I can see some differences.
This has been a really hard couple of weeks for me. The weather here has been less than desirable with 23 inches of snow and then a freak ice storem that left it so that people were able to ice skate in the streets. I have barely been able to get to work and after work, all I want to do is go home.
My plan for this week is to take my butt to the gym whether I feel like it or not. Getting active consistently is the one piece missing from my weight loss puzzle. If I can’t get to the gym then I am going to find a workout on Netflix, Hulu or YouTube and do that. It’s hard for me because I hate the idea of exercise but I am committed to changing my attitude. I’ve just got to do it. No excuses!
Well, it only took me half of the month to catch up on life enough to complete my first blog post of the year. So much for starting the year with a consistent weekly post. Sheesh!! Anyway, let me get you all caught up on the life and times of me.
I brought in the new year with my honey and some friends and doing what I love to do…singing. We went originally to watch the show and Micah and Cat invited me up to join them on a couple of numbers. It was a blast!! Good company, good wine, good food and great memories.
As of last Friday (my weigh-in day), I am down 70lbs since this whole weight loss thing started (down 4lbs for the week). Physically, I feel fantastic. I can move around without pain and without getting winded. I had been on muscle relaxers for chronic back pain for years and I haven’t taken them since surgery day. I can climb up and down the stairs in my house without having to climb on hands and knees like a toddler. My wife and I can go on walks with the dogs. We can go out dancing and instead of just part of a song, I dance through several songs and only have to sit down because a song comes on that I don’t like. I am enjoying the new found freedom that losing weight has afforded me.
I do have to say that extreme weight loss is a blessing and a curse. It has been a mental test getting use to my body as it changes. There are parts of me that hang that didn’t use to. My skin feels different to me, my clothes fit differently. My skin is changing, my hair is changing. It’s definitely interesting getting to know myself all over again. I don’t always like how I look with or without clothes. Some days are definitely better than others but I am learning and coping as I go.
I’m learning a few things…
Working out needs to be a priority. It helps you have more effective weight loss and helps you to gain muscle while you are losing weight. I’m getting more consistent with workouts but it is still my least favorite thing to do.
It is super important to take care of yourself mentally. Make time to pray, meditate, journal and pamper yourself. All the change is a lot mentally so you do not want to neglect your self-care; whatever that looks like for you.
Get use to never eating a hot meal again. That sounds weird but I honestly have not had a hot meal since I had surgery. The reality is that you just can’t eat it fast enough. The one thing this surgery forces you to do is slow down. You have to chew more because you don’t want to swallow big chunks (even of soft food). Believe it or not, you will get use to it.
Surround yourself with positive people who want to see you succeed. They don’t have to be on a weight loss journey (although you should have a few of those people in your life). Just make sure that they are not the people who are constantly offering you all the junk food and starchy goodness. Make sure they are people who are willing to listen to the occasional rant about ill-fitting clothing and a not-so-delicious new food. Most importanly, they need to be good cheerleaders who are willing to encrourage and slap that muffin out of your hand if need be. Someone willing to go on a walk with you and your dogs or offer alternatives for getting together other than eating and drinking (crafting dates, walking dates, mani/pedi dates).
Now, we are all caught up and ready to get back to our regularly scheduled program. I will be back on Friday with my weekly weigh-in
It’s been about a month since my last post because…life. I’m still here and still doing well. I had my monthly appointment with my surgeon last Thursday and I am down -11lbs for the month. For those keeping track, I’m down -64lbs since I first began this endeavor which was just about a year ago. I am down -34lbs since my surgery (July 29th).
I’ve got a long way to go. Unlike a gastric bypass, which gives you big loss numbers right away, the adjustable gastric band is a more slow and steady process.
I’m feeling really good. I’m having toreplace some clothing items because old stuff is just too big at this point. I am training my mind to not just automatically go forthe largest size because it won’t fit because it’s too big. It feels good to be able to say that a clothing item is too big. I don’t think I’ve ever been in that space in my entire adult life. I’ve had a couple of breakdowns because I am struggling with some of my body changes. I’ve always been big but I was solid. Now, I have jiggly parts that I didn’t have before and hanging parts. It’s all a big adjustment. Overall, I’m a lot more comfortable in my skin. I have to be honest; I wouldn’t change a thing.
Non-scale victory…we went to a concert last month at the Emerald Queen Casino; Musiq Soulchild. He is one of my favorite soul/ R&B singers. Not only did I navigate through the whole casino to get to the venue. I was able to stand and dance the night away. We had an absolute blast! 6 months ago, I would have never been able to do that. I would’ve had to stop to rest several times and sat through the concert.
This was not my best week. I gained 3lbs. i’m not particularly stressed about it but I know I can do better. I think its a combo of late-night eating and more carbs than usual. Plus, this last week wa pretty sedentary. In other words, I need to do better. No other changes to report at this time.
I jumped on the scale this morning and I am down another -4lbs. Whoop!! Whoop!!!
Yesterday, I had my first ‘fill’ for my Lap Band. For those not in the know, the adjustable gastric band is filled with saline periodically to restrict the amount of food/beverage that the stomach pouch is able to hold. I was super nervous because I didn’t know what to expect.
First, while I was laying down, the doctor verified the position of the port using an ultrasound machine and then by touch just to verify and drew a target dot on my tummy. Then, he proceeded to take the longest needle ever known to man…about 3 inches (wink wink) and stuck that in the area and inserted it into the port. Then, I had to sit up with this giant needle sticking out of my tummy. A crazy sight to say the least. Then, I had to drink water as he pumped saline into the band to determine when it was tight enough. How is that determined? Based on how much liquid I can take in at what rate. I’ve gone from gulping down my water and protein shakes back to having to sip them like in the beginning; which is what you want. Then, I had to lay back down and then he pulled the needle out. That sensation is unlike anything I have ever experienced. The best visual I can give is imagine sticking a needle into a cork to it’s hilt…one of those dense type from a champagne bottle and then pull it out.
Also at yesterday’s appointment, we addressed my scars. I have 6 of them. I think the biggest on is about 15cm but they are all hypertrophic. Because of that, the doctor is treating them with triamcinolone. He injected it into each one of the scars in several places. It was…uncomfortable. He said with scars the size of mine, it would take about 3 treatments so I will get injections when I go back next month and then again after that.
OK, that’s all for now. I’ll be back for next weeks weigh-in.