Tag Archives: stress

Hotmess.org.com.life

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Please don’t go typing that in because it is not an actual website; I think.

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Instead, think of it as a very accurate description of my current mental, emotional and physical state. My stress level is HIGH!!

I am having a couple of eye surgeries; the first of which is coming up next month. I have to be honest and say that I am freaking out just a little

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I have an eye disease called Keratoconus which has gotten progressively worse and has started to affect my vision and the ability to correct my vision with contacts or glasses. I am legally blind in the left eye and that will require a corneal transplant which I will be having around the end of summer. The procedure that I am having next month is called Corneal CrossLinking. I am having it all done at a clinic in Walla Walla, WA which is about an hour away from home and I am having to take a bunch of time off of work. Needless to say, my anxiety and stress level is HIGH.

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My hair is falling out, my skin is a mess, I keep breaking out in hives, I can’t concentrate and all I want to do is sleep and eat. Speaking of eating…

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At the beginning of this weight loss adventure, I promised myself that I would be completely transparent; no filter. That being said, I haven’t been following my program properly for the last two weeks. I haven’t been eating the right things, I haven’t been taking my supplements, I haven’t been logging my meals, drinking water like I am supposed to; just not doing anything I am supposed to. I usually start the day well and then by lunch, I get lazy and just eat whatever and then I think “I’ve ruined this day already so I may as well eat whatever I want for dinner”. It’s been a nasty cycle over the past couple of weeks. It also didn’t help that we went out of town two weekends in a row. I didn’t plan ahead which made staying on plan while travelling next to impossible. Have you ever tried to find something healthy to eat in a convenience store?
TODAY I’VE DECIDED TO STOP ALLOWING LIFE TO GET IN THE WAY OF MY SUCCESS! I gave myself a little pep talk/ kick-in-butt…
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I had my weigh-in today and came clean with my coach and declared tomorrow my official relaunch day. I gained 12lbs in two weeks but didn’t gain any inches; I’m down another 1.5in.
I am striving to “Look Great At 38!”

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Calgon! Take Me Away!

What a crazy, busy time this has been! It seems that I barely have time to catch my breath lately. Things for the wedding are coming together nicely and it seems time is FLYING! I must admit that I am a HUGE ball of stress and nerves but I know things will work out the way they’re supposed to. I’ve got hair appointments, lash & eyebrow appointments, dress fittings and vendor appointments. There are 11 days to go and I am FREAKING THE HELL OUT!
On another note, we recently had our 2nd Annual Summers Over family shindig. Good times were had by all.

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This past weekend I had my I Love The 80s bridal shower. It was loads of fun and it was great to see the costumes.

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I probably won’t blog again until after the honeymoon and I should have plenty of gorgeous pics to share from the wedding and Hawaii.

I Said Yes To The Dress!!

I did it! I picked a dress! It’s absolutely gorgeous and totally me; a little bit of class & elegance and a whole lotta sexy. (wink). I tried on a total of four dresses in my search for the perfect one. I am glad that it didn’t turn into a long, drawn out ordeal because getting in out of those things is a lot of work. By the end of things, both the attendant and I were sweating and breathing hard. The only thing that would have made the experience better would have been to have my mother there with us. Having her there to see me walk down the aisle will have to suffice. The best part of the experience was that in getting measured for the dress, I realized that I am down 2 dress sizes…on top. The tush is still not budging but I am cool with my weight loss progress.
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We had engagement photos taken and they turned out great so I will be completing my save-the-dates and sending them out in the next week or so. I am still trying to figure out invitation wording and figuring out when I am gonna get those mailed out.
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I have to admit that I am starting to feel a little bit of pressure now. We still haven’t chosen a dress for my Maid Of Honor and we still have to figure out what Tomi and the rest of the bridal party are going to wear. I still have to meet with the officiant to discuss the details of the ceremony, I have to meet with the DJ to discuss the playlist and I have to get with the venue to discuss the seating layout for the reception. I wish that I could clone myself for the next few months. I know that I will get everything done, I work well under pressure, but I am more than a little stressed.

From Distressed To De-Stressed

Yesterday, work was ridiculous! I was running late, started off the day by myself and then over the course of the day I worked with 5 other people including my clinic manager and a manager of another clinic.
It was great to have some help but the day as a whole was extremely busy, chaotic and stressful. By the time things slowed down I was drained and just ready to go; my brain was FRIED!
We had stopped taking patients for the evening and there was finally time to start putting some of the madness in order. My co-worker pointed toward the door. I looked up abd there stood my honey! She said “Hey!” and handed me a goodie…a small M & M’s figurine filled with the delicious candies. Then, she turned and walked out the door.
During my break she had asked how my day was going. I told her how it had started off kind of crazy and then spiraled downward from there. I appreciate her thoughtfulness in stopping by to give me a little boost to get me through the rest of my shift with a smile on my face. She’s awesome that way.

Just Me, JaVonna

Write! Right?

The one thing I have always enjoyed doing is writing. Word creativity has always been a gift and a joy to me. I must admit that lately, I have been feeling rather uninspired. Life is a little too real for me right now; I have so much going on. Some might think that would bring a wealth of experiences to draw from, which is true, but it is stifling for me.
I guess what I am trying to say is that I feel as though I am artistically frustrated and in desperate need of a release.

Just Me, JaVonna