I have had a lot going on!! This has definitely been a time of growth, change and renewal in many areas of my life.
I quit my 9-to-5 🙃. I didn’t have a new gig in place when I made the decision to quit but one presented itself once I hit ‘send’ on the email. Though I will miss the regular interactions with some of my peeps, I know it was the best decision for my life. One very funny discovery was the amount of selfies I took at my desk over 3yrs (about 70 that I found in my phone). As a parting gift, I picked some of my faves and gave everyone a collage.
I’m putting more time, energy and resources into my side hustle; my business as a wedding officiant/singer-for-hire called Absolutely, I Do. I’m working on my webpage, social media page and a few other loose ends. I’m just doing my homework because I don’t want to put out just anything.
And finally, I’m at a point where I have the time and energy to invest in getting back to taking care of me. I haven’t been eating or exercising like I should and have gained 10lbs in the last 3 months. In order to get back on track, I’m going to reset my body by going back to the beginning and do the liquid prep diet I did prior to and just after my surgery. I’m going to start with 2 weeks and then reevaluate. I’ll get 90g of protein via my protein shakes (with greens), increase my water intake, homemade broth, herbal tea. Plus, I’ll get back to incorporating at least 30mins of cardio/day; probably by walking the dogs. It’ll be good for me and them. Tomi will be joining me for my workouts so we can both get our healthy on.
As the new year approaches, I find that I am falling apart. At least that’s how I’m feeling. I’m fatter than I’ve ever been, my sciatica is debilitating but I’m too heavy to have an MRI to further assess the issue. Right now, all I can do is take narcotics to ‘help’ with the pain that never really goes away. I can’t sit up for any length of time without pain and laying down doesn’t help much either.
I got a letter the other day that my wages will be garnished starting with my first paycheck in 2014 for my student loans. My credit is crappy and my life feels like its spiraling out of control.
I am feeling sad and depressed and I am in tears daily. I am just really disappointed at the state of my life right now and I don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel.
I have to believe that God has a plan; that He is trying to show me how strong I am. He is preparing me for newness and change. I am choosing to walk in the faith and trust in the promise that God will never put more on me than I can bear. I have to trust that if He brought me to it, He’ll bring me through it.
I am going to pray. I am going to write (it helps bring clarity). I am going to affirm myself and speak and think positive things into my life. I am going to work to prepare myself to receive the greatness that God is going to shower into my life. I believe it and I am open to receive it. I am feeling discouraged but I cannot give up. I am choosing to acknowledge the bad things but not wallow in them. As long as there is breath in my lungs, I have to believe there is a purpose I haven’t fulfilled.
I am a work in progress and I am ok with that.