Tag Archives: ideal Protein

When It’s Time To Change…

Anyone who has followed my weight loss adventure knows that I’ve been on the Ideal Protein program. Well, it works and worked for me and for Tomi but I’ve reached a point where I need a more permanent solution. When I went to my last Ideal Protein weigh-in appointment, I saw a sign that scared me to death and that’s when I made the decision.

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The sign that changed my direction in my weight loss journey

My plan is to have Lap Band surgery. I’ve gone to an informational seminar and have an appointment with the surgeon, Dr. Fox, for my history and physical at the end of January. It will be 6 months before I have the surgery. I have to jump through hoops for the insurance company; 6 consecutive monthly appointments with my primary care physician and a medical nutritionist. My first set of appointments is today!
I am ready for this. I’m looking forward to learning how to eat again; portion control most importantly. I’m looking forward to working out, getting fit and feeling better. The Lap Band is not a solution. It is merely a tool that I will use to help me get to where I want to be.
I’m going to blog and journal the entire process so here we go. Stay tuned…

Weighing In

Soooooooooooooooo…it’s been a while. Quite frankly, I’ve been too embarrassed to post. I was down 70lbs at on point. I have half-assed my way back to gaining 50 of those pounds and I’m embarrassed about that.
Being fat is delicious and easy…until it gets hard.

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It’s all good until you come up against…a chair with arms.
That pizza is delicious…until none of your close fit.
The buffet is fantastic…until you notice people watching you make your plate. Are they judging me?
My joints ache. My feet, ankles and knees have started to swell again. I’m retaining water and I waddle when I walk.
We had a long talk with my coach this week because I am feeling very discouraged.

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I’m back on track; I think. Some people do well with meal prep and planning ahead. I do better with focusing on one day at a time so that’s what I’m doing. It’s treat season so its going to be hard. Every time I’m tempted, I look at my goals and ask myself “How bad do you want it?”. So far, so good.

I Fell Off…Of Life

It’s been a while since I posted or even felt like it. Life was happening around me but at some point, I stopped participating. I don’t mean to sound dramatic like I was going to end it all or anything like that. Never that. I just stopped. I got up every day but hardly ever got dressed. I just hung around in my lounging gear (yoga pants and a T-shirt) and napped the day away. And forget personal grooming like eyebrows and shaving and makeup. Too much work. I left the house but only so my wife didn’t worry. I can’t say I was feeling bad; or feeling anything for that matter.I woke up one day and realized that I hadn’t been taking my meds or anything. I just…fell off. I gained back 20lbs of the weight I lost because I had pretty much given up on my Ideal Protein program as well. Even though I was weighing in and buying food every week. I woke up and ‘snapped’ out of the stupor I had been walking around in, dusted myself off and started the journey back to me.

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First thing I did was go get my hair done. Then, I got my eyebrows waxed and got a mani/pedi. I started working again, at a job I really like, so I’m getting up every day and even ‘putting on a face’. Sometimes I don’t just because I want to sleep longer but I do more often then not.
Next, I made appointments with my medical and mental health providers to discuss and refill my meds. Idownloaded a phone app so I could enter my meds and track when I’m supposed to take my meds.
Then, I talked with my Ideal Protein coach, set a few short term goals and came up with a plan to get back on track with my weight loss plan. I am already feeling better and I am ready for the world. I’m not deluded that this is going to be easy but I’m open to the journey so here I go.

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Weighing In

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My nemesis...

It’s Tuesday…weigh-in day. I skipped last week because I had stuff to do pertaining to our taxes. Plus, I knew it would be a bad week after playing Granny 🙂
I was up 3lbs. I wasn’t too upset though. I had a good week but I know I need to increase my water and I am days away from the beginning of my cycle so I’m bloated. I lost inches in my chest and waist but gained in my legs so they canceled each other out.
We talked with Eva today about feeling tired of the program; I’ve been on it off and on for over a year. I am ready to be done! I know what it takes to get to that point but I’ve been bullshitting as of late. No more! I’ve set a goal date of my birthday (June 27th) as my 100lb mark. I’m more than halfway there.
My motivation for the week to come is this quote from Maya Angelou.

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Its a reminder to me that this journey I’m on is going to be hard work but it is worth it. I am worth it!
The quote of the week at the clinic spoke to me as well.

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Photo-bombed by my wife. Lol!

It will remind me to keep going and take one day at a time.
This was not my best week but not my worst either. No matter what, I’ve got to keep going.

You Lose A Few…

-4.1lbs to be exact! I’m back on track and back to losing weight. I had to regroup and get my mind right. I was feeling bored and deprived and I just needed a break.
Each week when I would go for my weigh-in and show a gain, I felt embarrassed and disappointed in myself. I knew, however, that if I stopped going altogether, even for just a couple of weeks, I would never go back.
I am definitely not anywhere close to my goal but I am on my way. I’m not happy with my outer appearance but on the inside, I feel better than I have in years. Some days are harder than others but I just surround myself with affirmations and positivity and smile on the outside even if I don’t necessarily feel it at the time.
One of our granddaughters is staying with us this week and on Easter, she wanted to take a picture of her grannies. She’s always telling me that she loves my outfits and shoes, my hair and accessories. Hanging with her is good for my self esteem.

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Easter 2015

I’m very insecure about my physical appearance so I usually don’t do full body photos but I felt good sharing this one. I was surrounded by my loved ones. My wife has been my biggest cheerleader through this process and most importantly, she loves me without condition; even when I feel I am unable to love myself.

Just Keep Swimming…

“Effort only fully releases its reward after a person refuses to quit.” Napoleon Hill

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Feeling determined...

I took this selfie the other day while st my Ideal Protein weigh-in/ coaching appointment.
Its been a tough couple of weeks and my coach, Eva, and I have been working on getting me over this plateau I’ve hit. Honestly, I got a little bored. I was tired of eating the same shit! Eva explained that even though I was having gains of a few pounds (from cheating), it is important to keep sticking to the plan and keep coming to my weekly appointments. We remixed my menu a bit and got Tomi back on board and I think I am headed in the right direction again. Most importantly, no matter how tempted I was, I didn’t quit.

Weighing In

Last week, I was down another 2lbs but this week, I was up 6lbs. I’m not sad about it. I have been having a hard time eating since I got out of the hospital. Anytime I eat anything, I get very nauseous which makes me not want to eat. I don’t seem to have an issue with fluids because I can’t get enough water but my body just seems to hate food right now. This should be a better week because I saw my doctor yesterday and she gave me something to address the nausea.

This past weekend was the 67th Annual Tacoma Golden Gloves. I have been singing the National Anthem at the matches for 10+ years now. One of the photographers took a picture that finally helped me wrap my head around how much weight I have lost. I know that my clothes are fitting differently and better but I don’t feel any different other than being less ‘solid’.

This picture brought everything into perspective and I cried when I saw it…

This is me 60lbs thinner than my starting weight.
This is me 60lbs down from my starting weight.

I feel so proud of myself. God knows this journey has not been easy; full of many ups and downs but I am staying in the race.

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Me at 25lbs down from my original weight.

It’s crazy to see the differences in my body and a bit overwhelming. There are times when I feel scared and I allow that fear to steer me toward unhealthy choices (I am an emotional eater; any emotion) but I am determined to conquer and live above my fear. I know that ultimately, I will be better for it.

Weighing In

Last weeks weigh-in was great; I lost 11.2lbs! It was hard for sure. It was my cycle week and I was having some serious sweet cravings but I stayed the course.

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This week may not be as good. My eating was thrown off and so I am sure the scale will show a gain tomorrow. I am fine with it though because I know my body needed the extra nutrients to help heal. I had a TIA and ended up in the hospital. It turns out from my MRI that i have a non-specific narrowing of the arteries in the back of my brain which caused the episode. Though it seems it was an isolated incident and there is no blockage, the doctor placed me on an daily aspirin regimen.
I am on the mend so the coming week should be good. I’m feeling ready!

Looking Back: 10 Things I Lived and Learned In My 2014

This was a particularly trying year. I can’t say that it was all bad but there were definitely some very deep valleys to go along with the peaks. I am thankful that I was here for the turmoil and the triumphs. I have learned a lot about myself over the last twelve months; some hard truths have come to the light. Through it all, I am grateful to God for seeing me through another year.
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1. I have lost 50+ lbs. this year. I haven’t felt this good in a long time. I still have quite a way to go in reaching my ultimate goal but I am well on my way. I’ve learned that being prepared will help to stop you from breaking away from your healthy eating routine.
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2. I went to my 20-yr highschool reunion. I can tell you that I was a true gleek. I knew and was friends with lots of people but all of my closest friends were in choir. I learned that nothing makes you feel older than realizing you’ve been out of school for twenty years. Just saying that gave me achy joints.
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3. I got to go to my first Seattle Mariners game. We had great seats that were right on the third base line. Also, it was Felix Hernandez bobblehead night. I learned that baseball fans are some of the happiest people on earth.
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4. We went to New Orleans for our birthday this year. We had an amazing time, ate some of the most delicious food I ever had and my wife got to show me where she grew up. I can’t wait to go back! I learned that you need comfy walking shoes whether they match your outfits or not.
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5. I lost my job. That is a very humbling experience. I learned that you should never get too comfortable. It also taught me that it is alright to feel your feelings but don’t wallow. Regroup and make a plan.
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6. I had corneal transplant surgery. Another very humbling experience. You are very dependent for a few days and that can be difficult. I learned that people can be very helpful…if you allow them to.
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7. Maya Angelou passed away. A woman who touched a nation. I love to read and hers was the first body of work I experienced as a young girl that was by an author that looked like me. I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings is the first book I read by her. My favorite quote also came from her. “I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life’s a bitch. You’ve got to go out and kick ass.”
I learned that living your best life, being true to yourself and kind to your fellow man is a beautiful way to live.
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8. We went to see Lalah Hathaway at Dimitrou’s Jazz Alley…for the 2nd time. This time, she was with Ruben Studdard. It was an amazing show.

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9. We celebrated our 1-yr wedding anniversary (11 yrs. together). Tomi is truly the mate that was created for me. Loving her is like food to my soul. I’ve learned that love changes; its work. But there is nothing, no situation, that love can’t conquer. We are strong individually but together, we are unstoppable.

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10. My baby girl got her first place. She also got engaged. I am overwhelmed with emotions over it all. She’s always been/ will be my baby. Now, I see her as a woman and I am not ready.

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All in all, 2014 has been a year of growth. I look forward to 2015 as a year to walk in the power of the lessons I’ve learned. I bid a fond farewell to 2014 and welcome the new year with open arms. Most importantly, I’m choosing to live by choice and make life happen instead of allowing life to happen to me?
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